Inscrutable

Turns out merriam-webster has a word of the day , and it's inscrutable. Cannot be scruted. 'Scrutable' is actually a real word as its antonym, they say. I guess they don't feel its a verb. I feel they didn't scrute hard enough.

I'm freakin sick of management crap in the lab. I really want to do science, not do all the 500 little things that keep the lab running and compliant and blah blah blah. Whine whine whine.

Have been trying to research amplification options for cello in the event that such will be needed for the Les Mis pit orchestra. I think it will be, but I have no idea how it will be paid for, because even the cheap options that are ok but not fantastic sounding run $200. The nicer systems run twice that and more.... I rediscover yet again that I could spend pretty much my whole salary on cello toys and accessories ... Just like I could on the RPG hobby ... why should hobbies be expensive? its not fair!

Started listening to a D&D AP (actual play) podcast, which is listening to another group sit around their table and play. Sometimes its really boring, and their sound recording quality isn't awesome (I have been spoiled by Fear the Boot (an amazing gaming podcast that is not AP)), but I do kinda like the story they are telling so far. Time is an issue. Maybe if I didn't sleep at all, I would have enough time to do all the stuff I want to do. Reading, playing, parenting (playing with kids), cello (playing), watching TV (playing video) ... but all the stuff I have to do steals time.

This post is BORING! I think I am a little depressed by my life. Which is dumb, I think - objectively, I do fairly interesting things. But I write down anything about it, and I feel like 'how dumb is that!' Maybe its a confidence thing. I probably still need more confidence. I wonder if that is also too expensive.